Nathan

Day 5, The Hard Ones

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9 (ESV)

              Nathan entered fourth grade at the age of twelve. He’d been held back twice, and he knew he couldn’t be retained again during elementary school due to his age. He could barely read, counted on his fingers if he tried at all, and kept his head down most of the day. His only friends were two other twelve-year-old boys in my class; one was a drug dealer and the other spoke very little English but knew all the Spanish cuss words.

              When Nathan wasn’t sleeping, he instigated arguments and fights. The three amigos, as I called them, threw crayons, erasers, and broken pencils across the room behind my back. I had plans in place on how to motivate and keep the other two friends in line, but Nathan was a struggle. I tried praise, incentives, and free time. I offered bonus problems on tests and easy extra credit to help his grades. Nothing reached this kid.

              After his second referral for fighting on the bus and missing several days of my class due to suspension, I had to do something. I had no grades to put in the computer, and I could get nothing out of him.

              “Nathan, I think we need to call mama. What’s her number?”

              He never batted an eye and spouted off a number. I dialed it, but it was out of service.

              “Is there a better number I can reach her at?”

              He gave me another. Same song and dance.

              Five numbers later, I asked his daddy’s number. This time he tightened up a little. “Nah Mrs. Adams. My daddy don’t wanna be bothered at his work.”

              “What’s his number?”

              He gave me the number, and his dad answered the phone. I told him what was going on and he paused. “Now, ‘scuse me a moment. Which Nathan are you talking about? I got more than one Nathan juniors. One in fourth and one in eighth.”

              With that comment, I knew daddy wouldn’t be any help either, but I let him try to talk to his fourth-grade son.

              Nathan made it to fifth grade, but not because of effort. His mama moved him and his siblings five times that year and never had a reliable phone number. I’m not one that believes in stereotypes, but I was sure Nathan would end up in jail one day.

              Fast forward twelve years. I drove through a fast-food restaurant, and there stood Nathan staring back at me. “Nathan, is that you?”

              He grinned and stood extra tall. “Hey Mrs. Adams. It sure is. I’m assistant manager here and I am store manager at the dollar store down the road.”

              Beaming, I responded, “I am so proud of you. You look so good and seem like things are going well for you.”

              “I had a wake up call in high school and realized I needed to get myself together or I would be just like my mama. I’m doing really good. And I’m proud of myself too.”

              My heart swelled that day. Nathan made it out. He chose a different way.

Do the Heart Work

1.      Who is your Nathan?

2.      What do you do when you find yourself getting to your wits end and still having no answers?

3.      What would it take to get your Nathan engaged?

Digging Deeper

              Read 1 Corinthians 13:1-8a.

Read the following passage. What instructions from Paul can you consider putting into practice in your classroom, especially with your Nathan? 

Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good.  Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.  Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.  If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Romans 12:9-18 (ESV)

If You Get Spare Time

              Write a note to your Nathan. Tell him the good you see in him and in what ways you’d like to help him achieve. Remind him that tomorrow is a new day and if he will put forth the effort, you will be glad to meet him there. After writing the letter, promise to pray for him regularly.