Self-Actualization Needs

Day 5, Maslow

But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil. Hebrews 5:14 (ESV)

              Darrien was a bright kid and had a sarcastic humor about him. He entered my class each day with teasing and jokes and left the same way. Even though he was a great reader and fast problem solver, he maintained C’s in every subject.

              After every test I pulled him to the side and asked why he wasn’t the top score in my class. I told him he could and he agreed with me; but he just didn’t want to. If the question required him to engage his brain past the comprehension level, he simply didn’t push it. He was okay being an average student even though he could have been more.

              Midway through the year, the class attended a field trip which required parents to drop off and pick up their kids. Darrien’s older brother dropped him off but no one was there to pick him up. After an hour of trying to find his parents, his mom finally answered and said she was busy running the bar (the family’s business), his stepdad was out back cooking, and older brother was out with friends. His mom asked if I could get him home, so I did.

              The family lived in a swampy area outside of town on an isolated dirt road. I couldn’t see the house because of all the random broken vehicles in the front yard. When I pulled up I asked Darrian a question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

              “Well, I can tell you one thing, I don’t want to be here helping my parents run the bar. And my mom told me when I started school that college wasn’t an option. So probably join the military and decide from there.”

              Darrien was no average student; he had plans and goals; they just weren’t plans and goals I understood until that moment. He knew that he had no way of making something of himself if he stayed in our little town. He had no plans of attending college, so why push himself academically when he could put that effort elsewhere. Even though I didn’t see it at first, Darrien had achieved the highest level of Maslow’s Hierarchy: Self Actualization.

              He had meaningful goals based on things he knew he could and wanted to achieve. He understood that he could not attain those goals if he stayed in his hometown and he had to have an option for escape, which was the military. I kept up with him all through school and he was a leader of JROTC and exercised everyday to be ready for joining the military the day after graduation. He had a girlfriend that he’d known since elementary school and they married after bootcamp and she followed him around the world. Today they have children and they are living the life he dreamed of as a fourth-grade kid. And now, he is seeking higher education through the G.I. Bill and chasing a dream he couldn’t allow as a child.

              The self-actualization level is where we tap into the drive to grow, no matter what stands in our way. I think of Ben Carson and Helen Keller; they stuck with their goals regardless of the obstacles. It’s being authentic, pursuing creativity and growth, and seeking purpose and meaning. No matter what, we never let go of that hidden dream.

Reference: https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html

Do the Heart Work

1.      How can you foster the dreams of the students in your class?

2.      How can you keep your personal goals alive and never abandon them?

3.      Do you desire to grow closer to God, no matter what stands in your way? How can you maintain this growth mindset?

Digging Deeper

              Self-actualization isn’t just for our academic or personal goals; it’s for our spiritual goals too. In what ways are you striving to grow in your relationship with God?

1.      But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. Amen. 2 Peter 3:18 (ESV)

2.      But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33 (ESV)

3.      If you love me, you will keep my commandments. John 14:14 (ESV)

4.      Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 (ESV)

5.      Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:7 (ESV)

If You Get Spare Time 

              Make a list of your personal goals and dreams. Then make a list of your spiritual ones. Which ones are you pursuing more often and more enthusiastically? Why?